Hot Wax should be no hotter than 120-125 degrees Fahrenheit (49-51 Celsius), to avoid burns, heat rash and even blistering.
HIGH TEMPERATURE WAX BURNS!
Try a soy wax at a low temperature melting point, or the cheapest cheap candles from the dollar store. Additives are put into candle wax to harden them, or to add scent and color. Cheap soft white candles tend to be the lowest melt temperature wax, because of the lack of additives, such as stearic acid, but other issues may also arise. Consider the submissive's known allergies to scent and oils in scented candles. One candle that we enjoy using is the big jar type holy' candles sold at groceries and drug stores.
POOLING HOT WAX AND YOUR INTIMATE PARTS
A drop or two of hot wax on a submissive's back is totally different than a molten pool of wax gushing down the cleft of their bottom and gathering into a painful, blistered pool on their anus.
WAX AND HAIR MAKE-UP FOR PAIN PLAY YOU MIGHT NOT HAVE PLANNED
Body hair can be somewhat protected from wax, and cleanup made easier, by coating the hairs with baby oil or mineral oil before wax play begins. Of course, if pain play is part of your scene, you can 'pull' the wax off with a flea and tick comb (the kind with very fine, very small teeth); scrape it off with a knife blade or even better, an old credit card. Some people like to peel each piece of wax off bit by bit. It takes some time, but you lover appreciates the time you spend on them. Some seasoned hot wax players flog the wax off or cane it off, as part of their scene!
If wax gets on your carpet use a brown paper bag and an iron to clean it out of the carpet fibers. Do NOT wash wax off in the shower, it will mess up the plumbing.
SHOUTING “FIRE” IN THE MIDDLE OF YOUR SCENE IS NOT EROTIC
As always, think 'safety'. Keep burning candles and flames away from any flammable materials. Never leave any flame unattended, not even when you finish the hot wax play scene and are lying together lost in erotic bliss!
So, think through your own wax play scene, discuss it between partners, plan for every foreseeable event in your hot wax play scene, and most importantly - ENJOY the warm, sensuous hot wax adventure. Stay safe and play smart, and you can enjoy many erotic adventures with your partner!
Read more following the article: Aftercare after Hot Wax Play
The Lisbon Fetish Weekend 2013 will present on May 31st|22h30 @Fábrica Braço de Prata, Lisbon (Portugal), the 5 award winners of the Fetisch Film Festival 2012. Fetisch Film Festival (FFF) is considered the best set of awards given annually for excellence in erotic fetishes and BDSM on film.
Watch the Lisbon Fetish Weekend 2013 Promo
The 5 award winners of the Fetisch Film Festival 2012 were:
JUMPCUT (8 min) Best short Film
DA KINK IN MY LAiR (18 min) Best Actress in a short Film: Yulia Petrauskas
THE CHAUFFEUR (24 min) Best Actor in a short Film: Johnny Kostrey
MISS D (18 min) Best Trans-performance in a short Film: Scott Speiser
MY DAY WITH TARNA (40 min) Best documentary
ALL FILMS ARE IN ENGLISH OR WITH SUBTITLES. FREE ENTRANCE.
The fantasies of a woman: scary and romantic.
Directed & Produced by Saskia Quax (Amesterdam, NL)
With Dutch Dame & Bob RopeMarks
Website: http://saskiaquax.nl/ (in Dutch)
“Jumpcut let you partake in a playful way to the sexual fantasies of a young woman. Sexuality is very personal and has no fixed frame. Everyone experiences sexuality always in his own unique style. Do you see the common thread: the love ” Saskia Quax
With Jumpcut Saskia Quax show us another, wonderful work was presented in the festival program. For her thesis studies in Audiovisual design, they had dealt with the subject of sexual fantasies. It was important for her to come on the subject as close as possible, without resorting to explicit pictures but it must.
They did, I think, the most impressive and accomplished with an extremely atmospheric balance of image and sound created a short film that charms and equally sensual touches.
The interplay between the mystical scene in which the young woman, as the chosen one, encircled by a dozen men in smokings, with their hands tied to the humiliating exhaustion skipping needs and sensual bondage session with the rigger pull the viewer magic in the sexual fantasies of the young woman inside.
DA KINK IN MY LAiR (18 min) Best Actress in a short Film: Yulia Petrauskas
Mockumentary about professional dominatrix Severija. It’s a one-woman-show with Yulia Petrauskas from Toronto in front and behind the camera.
This movie begins with the first shot a little earlier in the life of the Domination, namely in the bedroom. Mistress Severija (Yulia Petrauskas) is awakened by the camera and the lively East European is also quick to the point. Say, your mouth is probably the first thing that is really growing. We look to her as her make-up and experience a creative act. With its lively, slightly overdone way she has something sympathetic, but also a weird and unpredictable side.
The area in which the education of the young slave takes place is a large, empty hall or studio. While she firmly binds her slave to a radiator she gives an interview in the candlelight. Not without getting up in between to go to the sub whining and pull him with the whip strict one. The scenery changes between amusing, titillating, very consistent and unpredictable, you do not know whether laugh or whether one goes better than this odd film wondering just should.
"Da Kink in My Lair" Yulia managed a funny satire on the everyday life of a mistress, though the visual design so not equivalent to the classical ideas. With good actor's performance, simple styles and simple technique is to have succeeded produced a credible and entertaining, so-called mockumentary.
THE CHAUFFEUR (24 min) Best Actor in a short Film: Johnny Kostrey
An actress accidentally meets a driver who has some strange desires…
Audrey, a young French actress trying to make it in Hollywood, meets Tony, the chauffeur of a luxury car. She needs him to drive her around town and he is looking for a “boss” to drive him. At first, feeling ill at ease, Audrey doesn’t want to mistreat him. But as she suffers one humiliation after another in her career, she discovers that this little game allows her to vent her frustration on him… They complete each other in what begins as a fair exchange and becomes much more than that.
So the story unfolds episode continues to episode and Audrey and Tony play little by little the whole repertoire of sadomasochistic fantasies, repeatedly contrasted with the tough reality of the film City of Los Angeles, by becoming in a playful and increasingly familiar way. Maude Ferrari succeed with this short film the feat far show on clichés such as whips, collars and black leather, the beginning of a loving albeit unusual relationship. For Audrey is a roller coaster through the feelings for Tony well. The fulfillment of a long cherished dream, and for viewers in a credible and understandable introduction to a world of unusual fantasies and desires Here by the way are some of the questions touched on the discussion around this theme again and again: Who is here actually "the boss" and who seduced whom is a devout man at the end of the dream or the nightmare of a woman. Or the question whether the abuse of power as in everyday structures ever happen again, because not a much bigger problem than if a couple decides by consensus for a slightly unusual roles in their relationship.
MISS D (18 min) Best Trans-performance in a short Film: Scott Speiser
New Year’s Eve for a Crossdresser in New York.
Director: Stefan Blomquist (Stockholm/New York).
Website: http://stefanblomquist.net/
The story is set in the glam-punk era of the 90's and is about the crossdresser Miss D (Scott Speiser).
Miss D sneaks after a living by night hangover back at sunrise in his studio in Chinatown. Once there, he hears only times the answering machine in order to get a rough picture of the night back. On the responder, he hears the voice of his ex-love Gina (Zuzana Stivínová), triggering unrest and frightens him. At the same moment the bell rings at the door and his Chinese neighbor and landlady parked out front. He has worked with the eccentric landlady Mrs. Ling (Lori Tan Chinn) an agreement, he paid the rent in hashish and then the two sat comfortably in the empty bathtub, which is located in the small studio and rotate a joint. Ms. Ling warns against the selfish behavior of the ex-lover, when the phone rings. Gina is in town and wants to see D. D goes to the agreed meeting and must make a difficult decision. Either for the continuation of the troubled, painful relationship with Gina or a clean slate and an uncertain future in terms of his relationship with life.
With its eighteen years of experience she has to have something to say and this makes a direct, unaffected and sincere manner. She says what she thinks, speaks of what the situation is, in a profession, the benefits of the many secrets behind closed doors. Precisely this willingness of Lady Tarna produced one hand, a credible but also sympathetic effect on the audience.
The director and cinematographer Chris Caliman does not distract with additional music, a voice-over, or if a dramaturgical. Just this freewheeling reinforces the personal statements of Lady Tarna. This gives her the room. The specific practices taking place with her and explain something to their social background to their own individual way.
So it goes in a topic about dealing with bodily waste. Since childhood, urination and defecation is done behind closed. If talking about is not possible, it is not understood and to playing with it certainly will not do.
Lady Tarna explained with direct words from their own experiences and those with Urophilen (sexual preference for urine) and Koprophilien (sexual preference for dung) it receives in her house. A theme that I saw in such a way never explained filmed in a documentary so understandable.
Lust is primarily driven by the sex hormones testosterone and oestrogen. Lustful attraction is heavily influenced by pheromones (sexually stimulating smells) we send to one another, and is driven by a group of neuro-transmitters called monoamines that includes dopamine (no surprise here), norepinephrine (aka adrenalin), and serotonin. Norepinephrine and serotonin excite us, while dopamine makes us feel happy. These neurochemicals are controlled by a substance which is also found in chocolate and in strawberries, called PEA or phenylethylamine. It is PEA which controls the transition from attraction to love and attachment.
This brings us to the neurochemical, oxytocin, aka the "love hormone". This is an interesting neurochemical with many functions. One of the most significant is its ability to bond us with each other when it is released in the limbic system. Oxytocin is behind deep love, parent/child bonds, friendships, even love we feel for our pets. In fact, we could not fall in love without it. Oxytocin is not about lust though. It is behind the selfless desire to nurture and be close to others. Oxytocin is responsible for our feelings of intimacy, caring, comfort, and emotional attachment. It is an anti-stress hormone that comforts and has a calming effect. It's also been linked to monogamous relationships. Interestingly, it counters the effect of prolactin and cortisol, and best of all, there's no drop in effectiveness as we promote it.
Hot Wax Play can be fun but it can be dangerous too. Do you think it’s erotic having a burning pool of wax in your most intimate parts, or trying to escape from rope bondage in a room filled with smoke and burning curtains, all because there wasn’t no basic safety requirements of Hot Wax Play? As ALWAYS, safety comes first in any kind of BDSM exploration.
Some advices before the Hot Wax Play
A thin film of mineral oil or even baby oil on any skin to be waxed makes removal much easier and can be a fun erotic piece of the scene in itself
Spread an old sheet or tarp over the play area, to protect your carpet or furniture
Bring a flat hard surface near to the play area to hold your candles, wax pots and other toys securely - this helps avoid spills (unwanted spills) and prevents accidents, like tipped-over candles, etc.
Put a romantic or edgy CD on continuous loop, so that you don't have to stop the scene to put in another piece of music. Once you are fully engaged with your partner in the erotic wax play scene, stopping abruptly can cause major 'sub drop'! (Sub drop is also known as submissive drop and can be extremely upsetting, emotionally)
Gather all your scene stuff before beginning play - wet washcloths or towels for instant cooling of wax, ice in a bowl, a mini-fire extinguisher you can purchase from any auto parts store, and anything else you can think of to keep your submissive and your home safe.
Cuffs, rope and ties to keep hands and feet out of the action and out of the way. Cuffs are great for ease of use but rope, tape and ties offer the most versatility and opportunities for different uses.
Spreader Bars
Bars to keep arms and legs spread apart and restrained for better immobilization and access. Use spreader bars to keep your sub in place, in a certain position or unable to walk.
Bedroom Bondage Toys
Great, high-quality bondage toys including beginner packages. Everyone should, at very least, own an Under the Bed Restraint System for tying down hands and feet without damaging the headboard of your bed.
Collars
Keep your pet in line with a collar for sex play, or even a public collar for every day wear. Collars are designed for punishment or for use with a leash as well as a necklace during the day.
Blindfolds
By removing sight from the equation, you can take your physical experience to the next level. Blindfolds are designed to bring you years and years of erotic play.
Take your kink to the next level with the hard steel and erotic submission of dungeon irons, from professional quality police handcuffs to modern takes on medieval torture devices.
Hoods and Muzzles
Remove sight, restrict air or just create an erotic look with hoods and muzzles. Some have mouth access for oral or others provide complete black-out experiences not available from traditional blindfolds. Very popular for people experimenting with breath play.
Suspension Equipment
Create a more intense experience by taking your partner a little bit or totally off the floor! From slings and swings to suspension bars, there is a huge variety of what you can do once you take it off the floor.
Armbinders
Keep arms immobile better using full-length arm binders.
Sleepsacks
Experience the security and erotic feel of having your entire body bound up with a sleep sack. Some are designed for complete encasement, some are designed to have access by a Dom to 'the good parts' and others are equipped for solo usage.
Straitjackets
Created to be nearly impossible to get out of, a straitjacket can be a frustrating and exciting addition to your toy collection. We have every type from basic medical to latex and everything in between.
Medical Restraints
Play doctor and take your bondage scene to the next level! Make sure to check out medical toys to get your scene down to the details.
Your dynamic doesn't have to be public to be valid. The most intense BDSM scenes certainly take place in the privacy of people's own homes. When we belittle "bedroom-only" players, BDSM becomes about exhibitionism and voyeurism, about measuring up to outside observers. If exhibitionism and voyeurism is your thing, by all means, put it all out there, loud and proud. However, if people do not feel comfortable being an open book, putting their dynamic "out there" for the perusal of others, this should be respected too. On a BDSM couple there may be one who has a touch of exhibitionist, but the other hasn’t. One of them can be, in fact, an intensely private person. Many times one would fantasized about being played with in public, enjoying being watched, and making that connection with the watchers. However, the other partner would be uncomfortable and turned off. It wouldn't be enjoyable to one partner if the other wasn't enjoying it too. Public play, even connection with the community, is not for everyone.
Just because you don't want to get out there in the community and show your stuff in front of others doesn't mean you have to surrender your kinkster fantasies. Most of all, you should never, ever feel compelled to play publicly in order to measure up to others, or to somehow prove your kinkiness. The only one you have to prove anything to is yourself and those who you play with, either in public or behind closed doors.
Exhibitionism is hot, but not when it's non-consensual.
True luxury orgies are not just something you see in the cinema.
Several times a year, a select circle of people get together to indulge in their passion of luxury and lust. A castle with masked gentry, ladies dressed in opulent evening wear, spruced-up maids, naked desirable maidservants, and muscular servants of love, food prepared by prizewinning chefs and accompanied by the sound of string instruments. This must have been how orgiastic revelries were celebrated in France at the time of the Sun King. Noble, erotic castle parties are not just something you see in a movie; these parties are a reality for already more than a decade. After a welcome drink and live piano music, the guests enjoy a delicious multi-course dinner, prepared by top chefs, accompanied by corresponding wines with background music provided either by a classical string trio or a jazz ensemble.
Thereafter, you are invited to stroll around the castle. The arches and halls are full of delightful options and a number of bowers are available to the guests for all kinds of sensual delights. There you will find everything the heart desires: from large sofas for kissing and cuddling and making love to massive bondage frames, leather racks and crosses made of steel for the somewhat other desire.
At the same time, the beautifully designed bar of the castle provides just the right setting for chatting and socializing. There, the pianist entertains you with a variety of piano pieces until late into the night.
On these parties, masks must be worn until midnight. Furthermore, appropriate dress is required. Whether elegantly dressed, for example, in tails, black tie, evening wear, ball gown, or in erotic garments; extravagant fetish outfits are also very welcome. The clothing should in any case be appropriate for such a beautiful old castle and the special evening. A (velvet) cape that would also adorn a naked servant or maid, matches the mask. There is next to no limit to fantasy and the guests surprise us again and again with their breathtakingly beautiful and erotic outfits. The most important thing is that you feel good!
These parties take place in a stately castle. A hotel with a free shuttle service that is reserve specially for our guests is located nearby.
These guests are attractive couples with a desire for passion. As hedonists, they wish to enjoy valuable time with their partners and they are highly appreciative of the luxury and discretion they experience in these.
People who share their life, being in a BDSM relationship or not, always face life's problems, together. Life will bring situations where the Dominant, submissive relationship will be a factor in the final life decision but the Dominant will always make the best decision for the good of the couple. For example, in a strict relationship where corporal punishment is used, punishment is always used for the well being of the submissive and the quest of the common happiness.
You could be peeing on your slave, all the while holding them in the greatest of respect for it! Relationships where the Top really believes that the sub is just a low life and make certain that they know that, is a relationship that will ultimately end in failure. There is a limit in the humiliation you can give to someone and if the slave starts to really think they are a low life, you run the risk of huge mental problems resulting. The people in BDSM who have a successful relationship always keep in mind this respect. They know and respect what they are in BDSM.
Golden Showers, or Water Sports, are nothing harmful or toxic. Urine is a compound of 99% water, some minerals (mostly salt, some magnesium, calcium, potassium and phosphate), uric acid, little ammonia and some vitamin C and B complex. The use of your own morning urine is considered a great method of healing wounds and often recommended by healers/MDs lately. Some people even drink their own morning urine as healing portion every morning. We can say it is much safer than for example anal sex which has more risks of infections and injuries.
WARNING: urine is a rather bad environment for HIV viruses (Human Immunodeficiency Virus), but an HIV/AIDS test should always be done if you consider things like Golden Shower with your (new) partner. An HIV test can be done rather anonymously (without visiting your local doctor) when making a blood donor. They check your blood for HIV viruses and other STDs and infections and you'll get a document.
What is Golden Shower?
GS is a slang term for the practice of erotic peeing in order to enhance sexual intimacy. It is sometimes involved in D/s play as an act of humiliation also.
Why do people do it?
considering it a "dirty" act makes it very exciting
sharing something very intimate with someone you are very close, something you wouldn't do with a stranger
What about the urine?
Urine has a peculiar smell that we seem to instinctively shrink from. Our bodies balance our dissolved minerals by eliminating excesses. We also need to rid ourselves of a compound called urea. We instinctively know from the odor that, no matter how thirsty we are, drinking urine will render our elimination strategy useless. But that doesn't make our urine dirty - in fact - urine is nearly sterile when it leaves our body and one of our medically cleanest body fluids.
But "nearly sterile" doesn't mean it is completely innocuous - the urine can pick up bacteria from a urinary infection along the urethra (urogenital tract) (an infection you sometimes even don't notice). This might be a health aspect to be considered when you intend to drink another persons urine. Whether Hepatitis Virus can be transferred or not is still unclear. Urine of women, who use the birth control pill, contains female hormones, which can lead to a partial feminization when being consumed by a man.
What about the smell of the urine?
To prevent any "offensive" smell you or your partner shouldn't drink any alcoholic beverages, coffee or tea a few hours before you want to do it. Also food with lots of protein causes a lot of byproducts which can cause the odor. Best is to drink a lot of simple table water a few hours before you want to play.
A small amount of alcohol can be useful for dissolving inhibitions over what you plan to do. But large amounts of alcohol detract from the sexual pleasure and ability.
Through trial and error, women have discovered that the denied man is eager to serve but the sexually fulfilled man is often selfish and lazy. Not all men fall into this categorizing and that is why each couple must explore each other's sexuality and natures in order to discover that which works best for them. But overall, a woman will find that she wields more power and control over her submissive by keeping him denied. And when you think about it, that dynamic also provides for great mental stimulation for the woman as her knowledge that she is being pleasured as much as she desires but her man is being denied, will usually cause the female to feel more dominant and more powerful.
There are physical and psychological effects with male chastity and orgasm denial. A man must be led to prolonged denial gradually.
My husband is a good man, a wonderful father to
our kids, and a good provider for our family, but things have changed recently
in our sex life. He's a very handsome man, at 36 he has stayed trim and always
perfectly groomed, and I've always found his powerful position at the Bank to
be extremely sexy. Knowing that he manages billions of dollars of risk exposure
for one of the big-bad-banks, as they have come to be known, has always been a
huge turn-on for me.
At some point though, things changed. Work takes its toll, kids, stress, daily
life - it all adds up. I don't know that I ever really lost my sexual appetite,
I think however that I no longer get off on being his slut.
In previous years, he enjoyed my feet on his terms - foot jobs under the
table at restaurants when he wanted, masturbating and cumming on my feet when I
didn't feel like having his cock in my ass, mouth or pussy. Don't get me wrong,
most times I was really into it, I mean cum is wonderful for the skin, but
looking back I had zero control.
Alas, these are not those days. I haven't let him fuck me in months, and can't
recall the last time I let him use my mouth. No, these days, it is his face
that is getting used - on my terms and when I want to get off. And when I want
to give him a treat, I'm the one who fishes his cock out with my toes, pulling
his protein moisturizer with the bottom of my perfectly formed feet.
I went out dancing with the girls last week. Bending over in front of him to
pick up my keys before leaving for the night, I could tell he was painfully
backed up, and with my legs looking the way they did, I too would have
worshiped them.
I wore a tiny little spaghetti strap tank top, little black skirt and some
devilish black stilettos. I think a sophisticated woman stands out among the
little blonde chaff, and my girls and I were demanding some attention.
We would occasionally have some boys to dance with and on one occasion, this
innocent red-head cutie gingerly danced up to me. I turned and focused some
attention on him, backing my cute little ass up into him... The dance floor was
dark and I lost touch with my girls. I stood straight, leaned back into him,
and he sucked my ear into his mouth. Right there on the dance floor. We left
shortly thereafter and if my girls either saw what happened or smelled the sex
on me, they never said anything about it.
I walked into the house and my pussy was still wet from replaying my dance
floor encounter all the way home. Hubby was still awake, watching TV in the
den.. I think he was actually rubbing his cock through his shorts when I
startled him.
He said something I didn't pay attention to, but quickly shut him up when I
walked up, pushed him over onto the couch, threw a leg over his head and sat on
his face. To this point I had not taken the time to pull my panties off and I
was getting annoyed, my pussy not having access to his tongue and lips. Hooking
thumbs under the side strings of my LaPerla thong, I pulled hard and ripped my
thong straight out from my ass.
I can only imagine how I must have tasted - no doubt tangy from the sweat of
dancing and half-stale cum from my dance floor tryst. But I didn't care. This
was now my turf. I owned this otherwise very powerful man, and he was mine to
use and abuse as I like. I was drunk with the power of taking him, using him,
and I glimpsed how he felt for so many years, as I made my mouth, pussy, ass
and feet his playscape.
I started grinding my pussy into his face, bucking my hips and smothering him
in the process. Occasionally he would catch some air as I fucked his face. My
pretty little feet were now on either side of his head and I pulled my ass
cheeks apart, giving full access to my gaping pussy and asshole. I started
calling him my bitch, recalling fondly that's what he would call me as he
fucked my unlubricated asshole, and directed him to tongue my ass. He eagerly
complied and tongued my ass with aplomb.
Hubby's cock was bouncing up and down - he was clearly enjoying himself, though
I think he was probably frustrated that my knees were holding his hands down. I
could see he was feebly trying to reach his little cock with his pinned-down
hand. Intentionally being a bitch though, I didn't let him touch.
Continuing to fuck his face, my long overdue orgasm thankfully approached. The
closer I came to orgasm, the more force I directed into fucking his face. I
reached back and grabbed a handful of hair as it hit me, pulling him up even
further into my ass.. I pulled as hard as I could and bucked wildly as wave
after wave of orgasm brutalized my body. My high heels dug into the side of his
head and my asshole was now stretched over his nose. I had never really been
one to squirt, but became very aware of the fact that liquid was pouring out of
my pussy, into his mouth and down the sides of his face.
After what felt like the most intense, longest orgasm of my life, I collapsed..
I fell forward and rolled off the couch and onto the plushly carpeted floor.
Exhausted!
People who have foot fetishes may experience them in different ways.
Some people become aroused by looking at pictures or video of naked feet
and may even masturbate to such images or otherwise incorporate them
into their sex play.
He wants me to compare his feet to pictures of other men's feet and tell him how these men with bigger soles can please me more than he can. He also requested pictures of me with my feet on another guy's penis. Should I be concerned? I've tried doing research but can't find anything on this type of fetish.
(DOCTOR’s) ANSWER:
There’s not really such a thing as a “usual” foot fetish. No two Foot Fetishes are alike, here’s some of them:
looking at pictures or video of naked feet and may even masturbate to such images or otherwise incorporate them into their sex play
looking at people’s feet out in public, person may prefer men’s feet or women’s feet, or may prefer to see feet in certain types of shoes
seeing women’s feet in certain types of sandals, but only if these women had well manicured and painted toenails
taking care of women’s feet, he enjoyed pampering women’s feet, washing their feet, putting lotion on their feet and finally licking his partner’s feet
calling strangers and asking them their shoe size.
Your BoyFriend
I think it’s pretty great that he feels comfortable enough to share information with you about his foot fetish. Not everyone feels comfortable sharing their sexual likes and dislikes with a partner. Perhaps he feels like he can open up to you without judgment.
That said, just because you don’t judge him doesn’t mean you have to do what he likes or wants to do. It’s up to you to decide what to do with the information he’s shared with you.
If you’re open to trying out his interests, it could be—at the very least—an interesting and new experience for you.
And, if it works out, it could be an experience that brings you closer to each other if you two feel like you’re able to be vulnerable with one another and indulge each other’s desires and interests.
Of course, it’s up to you to share your own desires and interests with him and to ask him to try things—in or out of the bedroom—that interest you, too.
I say in or out of the bedroom because while some people very much want their partner to try something new sexually with them (for example, how your boyfriend wants you to participate in his foot fetish), other people want non-sexual things from their partner.
Maybe you want something sexual from him or maybe what you want is for him to spend more time at home, to watch independent movies with you, to sign up for tango classes, or to learn a new language together.
The point is that you two should feel encouraged to share your sexual and non-sexual lives together in ways that feel good.
TALK TO HIM
Of course, you’ll also need to decide what to do about this other guy that he wants you to interact with as part of his interests.
Who is this guy? Is it someone you know? Do you want to be sexual with another man? Do you want to put your foot on another man’s penis?And, if so, do you want photographic proof of this?
Or would there be some other way to satisfy his desires, such as by telling stories about such a scenario or drawing pictures of it or looking up videos or pictures of other people who have done such things?
These are conversations for you and your partner to have as you figure out what you two are and are not into.
The face is a central sense organ complex.Keeping in mind the damage that could arise from being hit in the face, it might be helpful to remember the five senses: sight, hearing, smell, taste and touch/feel. Any of these could be affected by a blow to the facial area. In hitting, be aware that you could possibly detach a retina causing long-lasting or permanent eye damage, rupture an eardrum, break a nose, bust a lip or dislocate a jaw. The sweet spot is perfectly between the zygomatic bone, or high cheek bone, and the mandible, or jaw bone, where the fattier, sometimes thicker part of the face is.
As with anything, and especially in the lifestyle,
communication is so important. If repressed or otherwise hurtful feelings are
being brought to the surface due to being slapped in the face, by all means,
this would make for a key discussion topic with your dom/me or top. The line
between abuse and play is always consent and motive, and can sometimes end up
being as simple as interpretation. One slap can be seen as very different from
the last and can cause motives to be questioned and consent to be revoked, and
sometimes rightfully so. Having entered into your dynamic or scene as a
healthy-minded, consenting adult, you should trust your own judgment.
When addressing how to slap someone, there are numerous factors to take into consideration:
The target, the face wich is going to be slapped
Slapping with the fingers, palm or full open handed
Slapping with the finger apart or all together
Slapping with a flexible wrist or a stiffed arm
Give it with a wide roundhouse-style slap or a close-up slap
